Here we go again. It's only Monday and already there is another clutch of lightweight nothings dressed up as Corrie stories doing the rounds.

Here are the top 3:

1) Stephanie Beacham isn't returning to Corrie

2) Tina O'Brien isn't returning to Corrie either (just like she wasn't a couple of weeks ago).

3) William Roache hired a pet psychic to talk to his dogs.

Now, admittedly, that last story would normally justify further investigation, but we've looked into it and it's really too daft to be bothering with.

Hopefully we'll have some proper stories for you as sson as something actually happens.

Corrie's Michelle Keegan has been talking to Inside Soap about her hopes for her character Tina McIntyre. She says she'd like to see her get together with Tommy Duckworth (Chris Fountain) and become the modern day Jack and vera.

She said: 'Tina still sees Tommy as a friend. But they're very well suited. In some ways, Tina and Tommy are like a young Jack and Vera - she wears the trousers and he's the one always getting things wrong.'

Having previously said that she would like to see Tina single for a while it now looks like Michelle is itching to get her hooked up with a new bloke after she recently dumped Weatherfield's hunky physician, Dr Matt.

OK, so we're as guilty as any of occasionally reporting a Corrie story that is actually a non-story tarted up a bit, but at the moment there seems to be more than normal flying around. With Christmas coming up journalists, PRs and publicity departments are winding down and dumping all their excess baggage before diving into the mince pies. We thought we'd do the same, tie all the duff stories up together and get them out of our system. Ready? Here we go:

Kate Ford isn't leaving Corrie - you heard that right, someone isn't doing something we never though she was in the first place.

Cheryl Cole isn't going to be in Corrie - Cheryl Cole has said she like Coronation Street and when someone suggested she should take a part in it she did what anyone seeking publicity does and said she'd love to. But she won't, you watch.

Michelle Keegan would like it if Cheryl Cole was in Corrie - but she won't be, so don't worry about it.

Helen Flanagan has bought a bag - nothing to see here, move along.

Emily Bishop to star in next year's Strictly Come Dancing - we made this one up, pass it on.

There you go, our cupboard is bare, we'll back with some proper stories ASAP.

Veteran DJ and Corrie fan has said that he wouldn't mind ending up as a permanent fixture on the soap, even after his death. He told the ITV breakfast show Daybreak: 'I've only got one ambition in life. When I die I want to be stuffed and end up in the Rovers Return. That would be my idea of fun.'

Well, we at Corrie Blog say ace, let's do it. Let's have him down the taxidermist as soon as he pops and have him mounted next to the Rover's dart board in a grizzly bear-style attack pose. That wouldn't be weird at all.

OK. Let's assume that every household on Coronation Street owns at least one car. Certainly Ken does, Dev does, Rita does, Tina does, Nick does, Lloyd does, Roy does, Peter does and Steve does. The factory has a van and Kevin has a tow truck. Mary even owns a motorhome! That's a very conservative guess of a minimum of 12 vehicles owned by the residents of a small terraced street. Where do they all park?

The tow truck and van are only ever seen on the street if they are needed for kidnappings or other nefarious purposes. No-one knew Rita had a car until it was blocked in this week yet now it appears she normally parks it next to the shop. First we've heard. Whenever anyone needs a lift to the hospital (which is quite often) there's always a car available, yet we never see them parked in the street.

If Coronation Street was real it would be jam packed with resident's cars, all parked in front of their houses as none of them have garages and the back alley is too tight for anything but a bike. It's not like there's even any yellow lines to stop them parking on the cobbles.

Either there is a resident's-only car park just out of sight on Rosamund Street or there is some sort of elaborate, invisible underground valet parking system in place. We think it's about time we were told the truth!

The new Coronation Street set in Salford Quays may have a major problem with wildlife making noise during filming. The soap is due to move into a new purpose-built set in Salford Quays but nearby waterways are home to thousands of ducks, geese, swans and gulls and the noise they may prove a significant headache for the sound department.

The only ducks previously seen in Weatherfield wree the ones found on Hilda Ogden's living room wall but now any outdoor scenes may be soundtracked by honking, shrieking or quacking rather than the familiar cooing of Jack Duckworth's pigeons.

Ghost of Pat Phoenix stalks the Coronation Street set, says the Sun. "So many people have seen and felt the same things that there has to be something in it," says Sue Cleaver.

They try to make Peter Barlow go to rehab, but he says "no, no, no," according to the Star.

There's an excellent interview with Corrie producer Kim Crowther over at Digital Spy.

Over on ITV.com, there's a video of Jennie McAlpine, Katy Cavanagh and Craig Charles when they appeared on This Morning. They also have the nominations for ther British Soap Awards, and one of them is pocket-sized genius Alex Bain (Simon). Hurrah!

Showbiz gossip site Holy Moly's weekly newsletter produced this little rant which was apparently emailed to ITV by a Corrie viewer: "On Monday evenings episode of Coronation Street Peter Barlow apparently (according to the dialogue and the pack produced from his jacket pocket) just purchased a packet of Gypsy Creams from Dev's Corner Shop. I was amazed as I haven't seen a packet of these biscuits for years. Can you tell me where your props department bought them from and are they available to the general public or have they made quite a monumental mistake? Either that or Dev must have a very old supply of these and the sell by date must have long expired."

The deeply wonderful NiceCupOfTeaAndaSitDown website (what do you mean, you don't have it bookmarked already?) confirms that the Gypsy Cream is, indeed, a rare breed. "We don't know of any mass produced Gypsy cream being available any place in the UK right now, although we have heard that some small bakers make them. The distantly related Romany Creams can be found in South Africa made by Bakers, or made under license in Australia as Kingstons made by Arnotts," they advise.

Eric Spear's iconic Coronation Street theme tune has come in at number ten in a survey of the favourite sounds of people in Britain. Since the other nine sounds were birdsong, children laughing, heavy rain, wind whistling through trees, ice cream van jingles, applause at cricket, waves breaking, hearing someone say "I love you" and the chimes of Big Ben, then this officially means that Coronation Street is the favourite piece of music.

Before we get too excited, it's perhaps significant that the company who commissioned the survey, Amplifon, makes hearing aids.

Thank you to everyone who replied to my question about the painting that hangs inside the Barlows' hallway. Tainted Love, Sue B and Abby Krim all thought it must have something to do with the scouting movement and its affiliation with the church. Edward Godding said that he'd had a friend in Bolton who had the same picture in his house, and now that he's been living in Canada since 1958, seeing the painting always reminds him of his friend Frank. Mike remembered that the painting was in the house when it belonged to Uncle Albert.

Another Canadian Corrieblogger, Pauline Hunt, came up with the full story. The picture is called The Pathfinder and was painted by Ernest Carlos, who founded the 107th London Scout Troop. His paintings portrayed the meaning of scouting, and his work was very popular, with many reproductions of The Pathfinder being displayed in scout headquarters worldwide. It has also been reproduced as cards and as a stained glass window in several churches. It has featured in Coronation Street since the very beginnings of the show in 1960. If you'd like to know more about this fascinating picture, have a look here. Thanks to Pauline for uncovering the information.

I've long been puzzled by the glimpses we get of the painting hanging in the Barlows' hallway. In fact, in my pre-Corrieblog existence I even wondered if it was a picture of Jesus arresting a cowboy. As we can see here, it's not so much a cowboy, more a boy scout. But why? Does anyone know? Email me if you have any information at all about this very odd piece of art.

I apologise for Kirky having his big head stuck in the way, but here's a nice close-up view of the photos they have on the wall at the Rovers' Return. There's a couple of Stan and Hilda (in fact it looks almost like the same one twice), and I can see Annie Walker there, a younger Gail and Audrey, Jack Duckworth with Alec Gilroy... Who else can you spot? And where else do you know of a pub that has photos of customers from years gone by proudly displayed (some of them a tad too close to the dartboard). Let us know!

As if it hasn't already been a bumper year for Coronation Street babies, a cast member has given birth to seven more!

Tess, who is one of the dogs who plays the role of Eccles, the Barlows' Border Terrier, gave birth to a litter of seven recently. It's her second litter, and mum and pups are doing well. While Tess is on her maternity leave, she's being replaced by her niece Maeve. There's a gorgeous photo gallery of the new babies here.

Eccles is usually played by three dogs - Tess, Phi and Maeve. In the scene where Eccles jumped into the canal and was dramatically rescued by Martha, it was Tess who was seen walking along the towpath with Ken, then Phi did the actual jump into the water and the bit in the canal (Phi is obviously the action dog of the trio, although she wasn't in the actual canal but a mock-up in a studio with nice warm water), and then Maeve was seen being dried off by Martha.

Recently, I've been getting a bit worried about Michelle Keegan. Tina wears those great big hooped earrings - they've become as much of a trademark with her as Vera's orange plastic earrings, or Becky's "Becky" necklace. But have you noticed what they're doing to her earlobes? They seem to be getting longer in every episode, and recently a little line has started to appear like her earlobe is creasing under the strain.

A recent report in The Times said, "Wearing heavy earrings can cause the holes from piercing to elongate, sometimes to the point that the earring tears all the way through the lobe. Ear lobes will not repair themselves, so surgery is needed to stitch the two pieces of flapping skin back together. It is not just splitting. The lobes swell and they have lumps the size of a marble that look like dumb bells on either side of the lobe." Ewwwwww!! I think it's time Tina gave her ears a rest and went the cubic zirconia studs route for a while.

Rochdale Online had a piece the other day about a lady called Edie Shufflebotham who was celebrating her 102nd birthday. Edie has watched Coronation Street since the first episode, and is such a big fan that she celebrated her 100th birthday with a tour of the Corrie set. Surely at 102, Mrs Shufflebotham must be Corrie's oldest fan?

Not according to the New Zealand Manawatu Standard, who feature the 103rd birthday celebrations of one Mrs Myra Letts, who has been an avid Coronation viewer since it was first aired in 1960. "I really lived for Coro, everybody watched it," she says. She'll be celebrating with family and friends, but doesn't want any presents, because, "I've got everything."

Darts were flying all over the place on Monday when the Rovers Return darts team proved that they weren't very good. I couldn't help noticing that a stray arrow managed to pierce a Coronation Street icon - Ena Sharples. But isn't it nice to know that Ena and Minnie still have a place in the Rovers?

The iconic brass band wail of the Coronation Street theme tune has been voted the tenth greatest TV theme of all time in a recent poll. The tune, written by Eric Spear (who was paid £6 for his work) was beaten in the poll by Only Fools and Horses, at number one, and That London-Based Soap which was number five. The top ten are: 1. Only Fools and Horses, 2. Minder, 3. Dr Who, 4. Match of the day, 5. EastEnders, 6. The A-Team, 7. Friends, 8. The Pink Panther, 9. Ski Sunday, 10.Coronation Street.

Read more: Corrie theme tune makes dogs howl
Man has phobia of Corrie theme tune

This is a question that's been popping up quite frequently in Corrieblog comments recently, ever since the Windass family first appeared in Coronation Street.

And the answer is - the name Windass originates in Yorkshire and Humberside. 161 Windasses appeared on the UK electoral register in 1998, so it's not a common name, but you're most likely to come across a Windass in the York area.

Other notable Windasses include Hull City footballer Dean Windass and playwright Dave Windass.

Corrieblog reader Cobblestone remarked on this first, but I was going to blog about it anyway, honestly!

Craig Kelly, who is going to be joining Coronation Street soon as factory boss Luke Strong, made his name in the Channel 4 series Queer as Folk. And his mum in that brilliant show was played by none other than Denise Black, who of course played hairdresser and former love of Ken Barlow Denise Osbourne in Coronation Street.

Antony Cotton, Corrie's Sean Tully, had a major role in Queer as Folk as Alexander Perry. As well as Antony and Denise, two episodes of the series featured Alan Halsall (Corrie's Tyrone) as Midge, and Paul Copley (who played Ivor in Corrie last year) also appeared.

ITV have put some of their favourite bits of Royal footage online for your viewing pleasure. One of them is the 2000 visit of HRH Prince Charles to the Coronation Street set. He was there to celebrate Corrie's 40th anniversary.

It's not the most spectacular piece of film you'll ever have seen - mainly of lots of people under umbrellas - everyone has a purple one apart from HRH who gets a restrained black one. It's fun seeing the Corrie cast as it was then - particularly a cheeky-faced schoolboy who grew up to be demon king David Platt.

Click here to see the video.

Today's trivia is a mixture of things, from wedding related trivia to statistics regarding babies and children. Do jump in with a comment if you remember more characters that fit some of these categories!

Oldest brides to wear a white dress to get married in would be Gail when she married Richard or Bet when she married Alec, both in their 40s at the time of their weddings. There have been older brides but they usually wore suits or nice dresses.

Dierdre and Gail top the list of most married women, four each, including twice to the same man (Deirdre married Ken twice and Gail married Brian twice). Ken's been married four times, twice to Deirdre.

A few people have three weddings to their name, including a remarraige to the same person. 1: Kevin who married Alison, and Sally twice.
2: Liz who married Vernon, and Jim twice. Steve who married Vicki and then Karen twice. Time will tell whether Steve hits the next level with four weddings. Will he and Michelle actually tie the knot? Hard to say. They've been on and off more times than Sally's knickers!

In honour of "Murder Week" on Coronation Street, this week's Trivia focuses on the criminals of the Street.

Characters that have spent time in jail:
Ken Barlow for not paying a fine - 7 days.
Tricia Armstrong for not paying her television license - 7 days.
Les Battersby for assault on a cop (though the cop threw the first punch)
- 6 months
Kevin Webster for assault on John Stape - 28 days but served 14.
Tracy Barlow for murdering Charlie Stubbs - 15 years.
David Platt for damage to property - 4 months, served about 6 weeks or so.
Steve McDonald for posession of stolen property (jail time) and for selling stolen car radios (fine).
Alan Bradley for assaulting Rita (but released at trial for time already served in remand)
Terry Duckworth for GBH.
Jim McDonald, once for breeching a peace order against Liz and 8 years for manslaughter (Jez Quigley).
Don Brennan for arson (torching Mike's factory).

And here we are in October already! Wow, time flies! October on Coronation Street seems to have turned into Wedding month in recent years, with Sarah and Jason tying the knot last year and Les and Cilla (illegally) marrying a couple of years before that. Eddie Yeats married Marion in 1983 on Halloween as well. Jason is the only one of those characters left on Coronation Street! in past years, though, Halloween also saw catalysts for a lot of storylines to pitch forward into momentous happenings. Read on!

You may remember that both Hilda Ogden and Maud Grimes had a hobby, they read people's tea leaves. Do you remember that Maud read Raquel's tea leaves in 1996, less than a year after she and Curly married? Maud saw Raquel traveling over water and having a new career. Within days, Raquel has landed an interview for a job practising aromatherapy...in Kuala Lumpur! She was gone within a month but several years later the back story was rewritten and we were told that she didn't get past London, because she was pregnant. She ended up in France.

The theme for today's trivia is a peek into the backstages of Coronation Street. Thanks to "Access All Areas: Behind the Scenes at Coronation Street" by David Hanson and Jo Kingston. This fascinating book looks into how the show is made, and is well worth picking up if you can find it second hand. It's also a book in which Glenda Young aka Flaming Nora had a hand in.

The "Green Room" is a lounge in Studio 1 of Granada Studios and is where the actors can go when they're not needed on set. Actors may catch up on their reading, play video games, talk on the phone, study their lines or just socialize. It's a room where all celebrities are equal and it can be very intimidating to the rookie actors that are confronted by so many veteran and famous faces all at once.

Today'sTuesday Trivia is all about Jean Alexander, RHilda Ogden. I recently read Jean's autobiography, The Other Side of the Street and enjoyed it very much. Of course, it was written and published in 1989 so any of Jean's more recent work and activities are missing but I thought I'd glean a few facts I learned from it, Corrie.net's biography and Wikipedia's Jean entry. Check back tomorrow for a gallery of photos.

Jean was born in 1926 in Liverpool and her full name is Jean Alexander Hodgkinson. She has an older brother, Ken.

Jean's first job was as a librarian but she decided she wanted to be an actress and joined a rep company in 1949 in Macclesfield. Other companies she joined included ones in York, Oldham and Stockport.