Monday moan: Liam Connor, love puppet

Remember back in the days when Paul Connor was still alive? He was the hard, ruthless one and little brother Liam was the gentler, funnier, more moral Connor brother. It was a good contrast, and Liam's character was developing nicely.

Unfortunately, since then, Liam has been defined solely in terms of his relationship with women. First there was Leanne, who was always one step ahead of him because she was witty and independent. His moral sense and family loyalty meant that he couldn't continue with that relationship once her professional connection to his brother was discovered.

Then along came Maria and Carla. They seem to be two completely different personalities, but they're actually the same personality in reverse. Maria is fluffy on the outside and pretty ruthless inside, while Carla hides her softness inside a hard shell. But they both wanted Liam, and from then on the poor man just became a love puppet, tugged from one side to the next with apparently no will of his own.

Maria has always bundled Liam along in front of her in their relationship. She bought him a dog almost immediately after their first kiss, and when he was in hospital with broken ribs and a punctured lung she took advantage of his vulnerable state to make sure she got an early wedding booked. After that, she turned into Bridezilla and talked about nothing but wedding plans until The Big Day. Carla, meanwhile, wasted no opportunity to try and assert her claim over him, with her vampish outfits and cheeky cheese casseroles.

Rob James-Collier seems just as confused about who Liam really loves as Liam himself. In November he was saying, "Liam thinks that all the angst and mixed feelings over Carla will melt away if he plays happy families with Maria. Of course, he's being totally naive." In February he reckoned it was just lust between Carla and Liam.

I love Rob James-Collier, he's a good actor and obviously fairly easy-on-the-eye. But I'm sick to death of Liam, the human ping pong ball. All it takes is a row with Carla to ping him over to the salon to propose to Maria. All it takes is a phone message from Maria to ping him back into Carla's flat for a night of passion. All it takes is ten minutes of determined pleading from Maria to get him to pack up the (noisy) car and head off for a second honeymoon.

Here's my exit storyline for Liam Connor: he gives up women altogether and decides to become a monk. Then at least he might get to make some decisions on his own. Plus he'd look cute in the robes.